How to Experience Your First Fire Breath Orgasm
BY DANIELLE GRAVES, INTIMACY COACH
PSSST HEY YOU. SO I HAVE A SECRET TO TELL YOU… DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN EXPERIENCE A FULL BODY ORGASM JUST BY USING YOUR BREATH? KEEP READING BECAUSE I’M GOING TO TELL YOU HOW.
I am being totally serious. I had a fire breath orgasm and it changed my sex and love life. Now I feel like it is my duty to share this with you so that you too may experience new levels of ecstatic bliss on a moment's notice. Breath is an essential part of any orgasm, but unfortunately many people don’t harness its full power.
Let me tell you a story about how I came to experience my first breath orgasm. It’s a technique that I have learned from one of my most beloved books on Tantra, “Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the 21st Century”
The author Barbara Carellas coined the term “fire-breath orgasm” as a gender-neutral way to experience orgasm using a fairly simple method. I found luck in my first attempt and have since been teaching it to others. I will share my experience on how it feels to experience this type of orgasm and then let you in on the steps required to do it yourself.
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My First Fire Breath Orgasm
It happened as I lay there on my back in a room surrounded by 60 people who were panting, crying, moaning, and even roaring(!). I had begun to question my decision to come to this Shamanic Breathwork class, as I tried to focus on the breathing pattern that was taught but it was making me feel lightheaded and uncomfortable.
With an hour left to the class, I switched it up and started working on the technique I learned from the Urban Tantra book.
Perhaps being immersed in a room full of open minded individuals expelling their energy helped raise my comfort levels. Or perhaps I was able to intensify the sensations in my body based on focusing my intention.
The orgasm I experienced at this breathwork class was unlike any other I have encountered. Perhaps the room full of open minded individuals expelling their energy helped raise my comfort levels or perhaps it was because I am accustomed to the sensations and was able to intensify them based on focusing my intention.
Regardless, what I did worked in just under two minutes.
The sensation of my first fire breath orgasm felt unique in that it was not sexual and not something I felt in the genitals. It felt more like my whole body was being charged with energy and this sensation moved up and down my spine like a wave in the ocean.
After my first attempt with this technique, I basked in the afterglow of my energetic orgasm and I realised I still probably had 55 minutes of the class left.
I began the breathing pattern again, but much more unapologetically this time. I let my hips rock and breathed louder letting out a soft moaning sound after each exhalation. The movement started to feel so natural that at some point I lost all control. My body was moving on its own, I felt energy moving in every direction of my body, especially in my head. What felt like the peak of an orgasm lasted for 15 minutes! I didn’t think it would ever stop.
I must have tapped into all of my energy storages in one go. The breathworkers came over at various times to support my spine and head and I had a sense that they knew exactly what I was experiencing.
Afterwards I didn’t think it would be possible to stand up until I physically willed myself to do it. I thought to myself, “If I could do that with just my breath then what would happen if I involved a partner?”
Since this experience I have incorporated erotic breathwork into my masturbation practice and use it regularly with my partners. A technique like this intensifies the entire experience of sex and deepens connection.
The peak of reaching an orgasm and the afterglow can be experienced for much longer than a genital-based orgasm, which typically lasts upwards of a few seconds. Every touch feels more electrifying and if your partner matches their breath with yours, you can reach this state together.
You can take this practice with you anywhere and it is available to you at any time. A practice like this is also beneficial for those who are suffering from loss of sensation in their genitals, erectile dysfunction, vaginismus, and so on.
What Tantra - and Science - say about Orgasmic Breathwork
Although this technique originates from Tantra, it can also be supported by some scientific evidence. Let me give you a brief background on Tantra so you can understand more of the philosophy and intention behind it.
Tantra is a Sanskrit word that means ‘woven together.’ It’s a philosophy or system that originates in eastern traditions like Hinduism and Buddhism but it’s essence can be linked throughout mankind's history as it is a method designed to fulfil an inherent need in humans to understand and connect with the divine.
In Western society, we have been more focused on using this practice for enriching our sexual lives but that is not Tantra’s sole purpose. Tantric philosophy essentially merges the spiritual and the sexual. So you may find that your journey of practicing the fire-breath orgasm may bring you something deeper and more transformative.
From a scientific point of view, breathing gives us life. In mindfulness training, connecting to our breath helps us become more aware of our thoughts and emotions and grounds us in our physical body. Numerous scientific studies have linked breathing to emotional regulation and its ability to change our physiology, such as our energy metabolism.
However, the entire experience of an energetic orgasm can be hard to explain in purely physical or scientific terms. Which is why I suggest looking into its spiritual origins and incorporating a meditation practice if you want to further understand it.
Preparing for your first Fire Breath Orgasm
I will now take you through the steps to unlocking your first fire breath orgasm. I assure you that once you get it, you won’t look at masturbation the same way.
Like any practice, you may need to do this a few times in order and figure out what works best for you. Be patient with yourself. The most important thing is to have an open mind and be as intuitive as possible with the sensations you will experience.
The feeling of a fire breath orgasm is undeniable. And I can reassure you that you know when you’re having one.
I suggest setting aside at least 15 minutes for your first attempt but once you learn the technique you won’t be needing more than 5 minutes. Practice in a place where you feel comfortable and won’t be disturbed. I like to lay on my bed but a yoga mat or couch works as long as your head and spine are in one line.
If there are any other things you would like to incorporate in order to get into a more relaxed state of mind, such as playing music or diffusing essential oils then I encourage you to do so.
The 3 Step Fire Breath Orgasm Technique
Step 1: Feel
The best position to do this is lying down on your back with your neck and spine aligned and knees bent with feet flat on the floor.
Take in deep breaths through your nose and as you exhale through your mouth let out an audible sigh, almost like a moan. Squeeze your pelvic floor muscles as you inhale and release as you exhale. Rocking your hips back and forth to the rhythm of your breath also helps build up the energy.
Step 2: Visualize
Once you have gotten that rocking movement down, do your best to relax your mind and not overthink what your body is doing. It does seem like a lot to focus on all at once but it starts to become easier with practice.
What I like to focus on in order to distract my mind is imagining a white ball of light moving up to each chakra center as I breathe. When I feel like there is enough energy built up in my root chakra, which is located in the pelvic region, then I will move up to the sacral chakra and focus on breathing into that area.
Continue this pattern by visualizing your breath moving up through each chakra one at a time. It is an intuitive feeling when you move from one chakra to the next. As a result your audible exhale may start to reach higher pitches as you move up and your breath becomes quicker.
For me by the time I reach the heart chakra I know I am close. I will start touching my throat chakra and then my third eye chakra to almost physically move the energy up and by the time I touch my crown chakra, I know I am ready to release.
Step 3: Experience
Once you have breathed all the energy into your crown chakra, hold onto that energy and build up for as long as possible by straightening your legs to the ground and clenching all your muscles.
Don’t breathe until you feel like you need to. With this next gasp of air, a wave of energetic bliss will overcome you. Allow your body to move freely and naturally in whatever direction this takes you.
An energetic release may bring up various emotions like laughter or tears. Allow those to come out freely and naturally as well.
Helpful Tips to Guide You to your First Fire Breath Orgasm
When working with your energetic body, there may be areas where you feel stuck. Emotions and trauma can be stored in your body and practices like this work on releasing it.
Once released, you may feel varying emotions and memories that accompany the stuck energy. It is best to let it out naturally so that your body can become an open channel for positive energy to freely flow through.
Once you are able to experience an energetic orgasm, my favorite thing to do next is to combine this practice with masturbation and sex. Imagine doing this whole exercise while stimulating the genitals or using a sex toy. For me, this sensation transcends time itself.
I call it “my meeting with God.”, and if you like how that feels then definitely consider involving your partner. Even when doing this with a partner, various emotions may arise.
I have had multiple experiences where tears flowed after reaching orgasm through the combination of penetration and breathwork with a trusted partner. It felt immensely intimate and uplifting because this partner continued to hold space with me as I allowed whatever emotion I was experiencing to pass.
Take your time, be patient with yourself, keep your mind open and give yourself permission to release. When you make this a regular practice in your life, all the pleasure you experience - whether sexual or not - will be enhanced. All it takes is your breath.
Need more guidance on how to have your first fire breath orgasm or want to explore new ways to deepen connection with your partner? Book a session with me or look out for my next workshop. Readers of this blog get their first session with me for free! Reach out to me through my website link below.
Danielle Graves is an intimacy coach and sex therapist in training. She focuses on teaching others how to deepen human connection, increase intimacy, and fully embody the person who deserves to love and be loved.